Emotions: Perplexed Complexity. // 我的生活雑感。～橙思い日记本～

January 2, 2005

Prerogatives

I feel vulnerable. People close to your heart makes it all the more easier to break you. And it didn’t help with the MSN conversation earlier just now with one of my closer friend, who finally came clean with his words, when I questioned him just now about some unresolved issues. Sometimes it just feels so sickening, this world’s full of idiotic people trying to cook up excuses for themselves, defending themselves even though they know they’re actually guilty. And rather than feeling remorseful, they can still tell you their own prerogative perspectives and opinions, without giving a damned shit about you. I don’t wanna mention names, I never will mention names. It’s part of my principle to always respect people’s privacy. But if you’re still not happy with what I write, give me a good enough reason why I should take down my entry just because of you. So until you can convince me of that, quit bitching about what I write in my blog, cos it’s my blog and I have my prerogatives too.

Anyway I just hanged up the phone with Jeremy not too long ago, had a long chat with him regarding this issue. I shall not go in-depth into this matter but let’s just say, once bitten, twice shy. To give the benefit of the doubt to the person involved, if you really wanna know, I will still trust you, but probably not like before anymore. Things will never be the same anymore from now on, it’s a fact and you can’t change that. Since you have your own perspective of seeing friendships, I have my own too. But if you can’t even carry out and fulfill your promises, I really don’t see the need to hold you in high regards in my social circle, to me you’re just another one of those person who talks louder than actions, and since talk is cheap, you had just successfully declasse yourself in my eyes.

I’m totally not elated at all, having to write this kind of post on my blog, especially just after the first day of the new year has passed. Sometimes I really wonder why I keep having to meet this kind of people in my life, probably I’m just been too nice to people, but why be the nice guy always? Nothing for me to gain also, I really should consider trying to be the bastard in life, to make life easier for me. Then I don’t have to keep to my promises and be an ultimate bastard, making lives worse for other people…MUAHAHAHAHA.

Maybe I should just go and sleep. Things will probably turn for the better tomorrow when I wake up. Though I probably know I’m just lying to myself. Bleh.

Filed under: Emotions :: 5:10 am
Doodle on me please? >>

2 Comments »

yeap, i tink we shld be bastard at times. LOL! look on the bright side. things will be better, someday… take care ya? have a good weekend

-ailee

Comment by Anonymous — January 9, 2005 @ 1:39 am

Lol, perhaps? maybe? I dunno…most of the time I will just try to be the nice guy, help my friends whenever I can, I guess it’s really just me. Or maybe I should start learning to have this ‘bo chup’ attitude, lol act blur, sotong etc.

Yup u too! Have a nice weekend! Nice to see ya drop by, u’re like such a rare visitor of my blog. *laffs* (^ ^ “)

Comment by monsieur aaron — January 9, 2005 @ 2:23 am