Reflection. Things and people reflect through my mind. I reflect upon my own self, the things I have done and what I have done for other people. Sometimes upon reflection, we regret on our decision that we’ve made. Having second thoughts and wondering how the results will turn out if you could turn the time back and make that alternate move or decision, turning that into the perfect and right decision at that same time, instead of the one that we actually made, and regretting it thereafter. Tell me how often do u make that decision of yours and not regretting it after some time. Then again, it’s undeniable there’s never a definite choice or decision. The reason why we so often make and make do with our choices and decisions in life is just simply well, cause we often try to deceive ourselves? No? Or probably I’m just thinking too much.

I had a weird dream last night. I was on a vacation with one of my ex-crush that I really liked last time but never had the chance to be with. I still keep in contact with her now in reality, she’s studying in NUS and 2 years younger than me. One whom I had never really thought of having a serious and long relationship with, cause at that time I’m still not really into serious relationships; I’m just eighteen years old at that point of time. Yeah I know I sound immature and childish, nevertheless she was one girl whom we both had mutual feelings for each other at that time, we dated for awhile but somehow we never ended up together. Don’t ask me why, I probably didn’t like to think too much at that time so I just took things easy and letting go of things easily too. Taking things easy was me at that time.

Let’s fast forward to today. Somehow I’m glad I can take things seriously now. Then again, sometimes I really hate myself for taking things seriously. Why? Cause in the long run, I think I’m only at the losing end. The one getting hurt in the process is still me. If I do not let things go, if I still struggle to cling on to something that doesn’t exist anymore, or just someone who has walked out from my life out of sudden, it will only be just pure memories for me to savour upon, for me to remember somewhere deep in my heart. Then again, I guess that’s the purpose for memories, sweet or bitter. An inevitable process or phrase in life for you to continue walking on in your life, moving on the present and into the future.

Talking about the present, I had a great weekend. Was out with Jeremy and Kaiwei, had a great dinner with them at Pastamania at Plaza Sing. After that it was some crazy fun at the arcades, I was really crazy that I think I had too much of Initial-D Arcade Stage that day. So much so that my right hand wrist and palm kinda aches now. Haha talk about working out for the hands…silly me. Soon Kaiwei had to leave cause he was catching The Forgotten with his gf, so me and Jeremy suggested catching a movie instead for the evening, went to buy the tics for The Shutter, a Thai horror flick.

Frankly speaking, it was a rather good horror flick actually, unlike any of those B-grade horror movies I have seen like *cough*Ju-on *cough*. It had a rather original story-plot and good scare-factor, I kinda enjoyed the movie, you can actually feel for the characters inside the movie especially the poor girl. I won’t go on further but do go watch it if you’re a horror fan, which I’m quite sure Priscilla will be catching this hehe. Thumbs up for this Thai horror movie production.

I actually had plans for going to the Motor Show at Suntec on Sunday, but somehow things were screwed up. I shall not go further into that, it’s just a minor thing actually but somehow, sometimes I really wished that people wouldn’t be too selfish about themselves to ignore the people around them, especially when you had made that promise. Not telling us that you had something on later in the day, that you had to leave early, sometimes it’s really hard for us to compromise if you don’t speak up and let us know in advance. I’m sure if he’s reading this, he will know what I mean. And letting me down is one thing, but if there’s 2 of us, somehow I sure hope you will be guilty enough that you don’t repeat this same mistake again. I’m sure Jeremy also wouldn’t hope for things like this to happen again. The reason why we don’t say it in your face and tell you off is because, you are our friend. Compromises are made during times like this, but do not take us for granted please. Sometimes I really hope you can be more conscious about what you do and be aware of your own actions, and what consequences it will bring.

Speaking of which, I certainly do hope I will be more conscious and aware of my own actions too. I hope I can be a man of word and fulfill my words of promises without failing anyone. It hurts to break a promise and hurt someone’s feelings, I know it myself for I do hate this kind of feeling myself too. It ain’t easy to trust someone when he or she breaks that promise, and I certainly do not want to be that someone who is not trustworthy, someone who is not reliable at all.

Sometimes I think I do have some ego too. Thinking about how others actually think of me, how others actually see me as an individual. It’s kinda weird and funny in a way. Sometimes you wonder, do people even talk about you. They can talk to you about their girlfriends, boyfriends, loved ones, their school or work life, the greatest or most happening things that ever occured or happened to them recently. But sometimes you really wonder whether they ever talk about you at all? Or in this case, about me? Well, simply just questions in time due. But honestly I think it’s important to know that you exist in somebody else’s life. It gives you an inspiration to live on, and do things in life. Afterall, I think we are pretty much dependable on one another in life, be it dependable on a friend or your loved ones around you. And as much as you’re independant as you can be, I’m quite sure we can never be as independant as AI, cause we are just simply humans. We survive and live and do things based on our feelings, and how we think and what we deem in our lives. It goes around in a cycle and that probably explains why we like company so much, like to chill around with our friends and seek company when we’re bored or lonely in that same sense.

Gosh, I seemed to write alot today. I was supposed to blog over the weekend but I had things to do, so lazy-me didn’t bother to blog at all recently till today. Ok signing out, more interesting adventures (and thoughts) of monsieur aaron to come, later folks and good night everyone. (^ ^)